Veteran Nollywood actress Shaffy Bello recently shared her candid thoughts on relationships, dating younger men, and her perspective on marriage during a conversation on Dear Ife, the podcast hosted by Ifedayo Agoro.
The 54-year-old actress, affectionately known as “Aunty Shaffy” in Nollywood, opened up about her past experiences and how her mindset has evolved over the years.
Shaffy revealed that she once dated a younger man “for the fun of it,” but now, she’s in a different headspace. At this point in her life, she says, what she desires from a relationship is much more serious and rooted in a deeper understanding. “I can’t date a younger man. There’s no need to,” she admitted. “I’ve done it before, but I don’t want to do it again.”
While she emphasized that there’s nothing inherently wrong with dating someone younger, she explained that her priorities and desires have shifted. “When I dated the younger man, I was having fun, and it was for a season. That season is over,” she added. Now, Shaffy is more focused on finding a partner who aligns with her current mindset and long-term goals.
Despite her change in relationship preferences, Shaffy is still open to marriage, but with a fresh perspective. Having been married to Mr. Akinrimisi from 1995 until 2020, with whom she shares two children, Shaffy now views marriage with a more open, flexible outlook. She admitted that her views on marriage may differ from the traditional, rigid expectations held by many in Nigerian society.
“I know for sure what I want now is marriage,” she said. “But I have a very different opinion when it comes to what we [Nigerians] believe marriage is. I think a lot of people are very rigid when it comes to marriage. I would rather leave it there.”
For Shaffy, marriage isn’t about adhering to societal norms but about what feels right for her in this phase of her life.
Even at 54, Shaffy’s charm hasn’t waned. She shared that men, both older and younger, still slide into her DMs, which she finds flattering. However, she expressed her frustration with some of the less-than-appropriate approaches she receives.
“Yes, men still slide into my DM. When you’re over 50 and young men still slide into your DM, that’s flattering,” she said with a smile. “But some of them are just badly behaved. Some will come and say, ‘Hi dear.’ You know, you just want to insult their mother. But it’s flattering.”
Shaffy’s playful comment highlights the awkwardness that can sometimes come with unsolicited advances, though she still appreciates the attention.
As Shaffy Bello continues to thrive in both her personal and professional life, she remains unapologetic about her choices and the way she views relationships. She has embraced the idea of evolving and changing, both as a woman and as an individual with her own desires, rather than conforming to what society expects from her.
With a wealth of experience behind her, Shaffy’s insights are a reminder that relationships and love don’t always follow a one-size-fits-all formula. Whether it’s dating younger men, navigating marriage, or simply enjoying life on her own terms, Shaffy is proof that embracing change is one of the keys to finding happiness at any age.
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